Wednesday, January 28, 2015

The only living boy in New York

You know when you're being hard core crazy? 

Sunday, January 25, 2015

Did you ever love her? Do you know? Or did you never want to be alone?

Everyone is really annoying me. I'm confused why  no one else is understanding that MY IPOD ISN'T WORKING AT ALL. It's stuck on the "eject" screen and I can't get it to get off. All of my buttons on the clickwheel are broken, I can only swipe around the wheel so I can't do a hard reset and it's not like they make iPod classic's anymore and I can't go out and buy another one. When things happen to my iPod I start to get a little crazy. It's basically been my entire life since sophomore year of college. We've been through everything together and it holds so much more than just music. I've never loved anything that long or used something on a daily basis. APPLE YOU BETTER HELP ME OUT HERE. I might have to take it to get a new clickwheel but if that doesn't work or it doesn't resolve itself, I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't want an iPod touch. I hate Apple for getting rid of the classic. The touch is so stupid. Why do I need a touch? I can't fit as many songs on it and I can already get on the internet with my phone. Classic's are so much more durable. I'm trying really hard to be strong right now, but it's really hard. We've been through so much, you don't understand. This is literally the only thing that is always there for me. I've been looking online and the only place you can buy one is ebay and I don't want to buy one if I don't know it's been handled well and is working. 

I can't yell at anyone either. I just need to call someone to yell and get my anger out. But I have no voice so it just sounds pathetic and really hurts my throat.

Let's be honest: There's one thing I can't stand and that's when people say "I'm sorry". That's the worst thing you can say to me and I assume to anyone going through anything. Yes, I realize I'm being dramatic. Oh wow. I'm throwing out the "ya" because I'm so annoyed

I just wish I was Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks would come save me from my useless relationship. 

And honey I only appear so I can fade away

I'm still in love with the new FOB album and I don't understand why no one else is freaking out about it. 

I've been sick for the last week. Well, not even sick, I just have no voice. It's quite annoying actually. The whole not being able to speak thing. 

I don't even remember if I uploaded these pictures. We went to see some wrastling toward the end of 2014. I'm not even sure how we acquired these tickets. They were hand me downs from my cousins and no one wanted us to go, they just had extra tickets. 
As you can tell, they were very far up...

I had to buy a tshirt because I was sweating so much that night. Remember that alter server kid who was sweating so much it looked like someone dumped a bucket of water over his head? That was me. So I spent 30 dollars on a stupid wrestling shirt, but I wear it on an almost daily basis, so I can't be mad. 

Friday, January 23, 2015

You know what?

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

And I’ll spin for you like your favorite records used to

The only good thing about this week was the new Fall Out Boy CD coming out. I can't even talk about how good it is. Other than that I feel like crap. I actually feel alright now, I just can't mentally handle work at the moment. I gave work my best effort today, but it wasn't cutting it. I'm ready to take another bath. I got this really good smelling bath bomb from Lush. I got a purple bath bomb. And in an effort not gross people out with my legs, I'll let you use your imagination. 

I randomly found these:

I'm not sure how it happened, but I like it. I think these are from 2013; Easter and Christmas, respectively. 

Otherwise, everything has been fairly boring. Work has been lame and busy. I'm ready for a new career. I did this for a year, can't take much more. I made it to a year and a few months. And I have no plans to leave this job, so I'm sure it'll be a year and a lot of months. 

On working out; It really needs to start happening. I could go now but I have the energy level of about a 2.3%. 

Sunday, January 11, 2015

all your flaws are aligned with this mood of mine

With 2015, I decided that I was going to try to be more positive...Well, that isn't going so well. I've really given it a good effort, but I think that it's just so ingrained in my mind to be negative about everything, that I don't even know if there's hope for me. I'm really tired of everyone being so negative all the time and always talking about how much they hate their lives and how fat they are and how poor they are, etc,. Now clearly I do the exact same thing, but I'm going to try to do it less. Now that I'm the fattest person I know, it just really irks me when skinny people talk about being fat. It's very hard to be positive when you're floating in a bunch of that smelly water.

Also with 2015, I think that I've gotten a lot better at talking about my feelings. Which is probably a bad thing for everyone else. This wasn't something that I wanted. I love bottling up my feelings, but sometimes it just comes out of me like word vomit, Mean Girls style. This isn't like normal person word vomit, just like baby steps of vomit.

Other than that, I've just been working, playing Sims 4 and watching Parenthood. Parenthood is the best show ever and it's so happy.

One fun thing that happened was our furnace broke on the coldest day this winter. It was -17 wind chill and that morning was -1. We ended up staying at my aunts one night and then the furnace was ready to go the next day, thank God. Alex and I broke my aunts bed frame. Always fun.