Friday, March 28, 2014


  • 1: Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?
    • I sure could
  • 2: Are you single/taken/heartbroken/confused?
    • Single
  • 3: What if I told you that you were pretty?
    • My reaction would depend on who you were. 
  • 4: Ever been told “it’s not you, it’s me”?
    • Nope. I always know what it is. 
  • 5: Are you interested in anyone right now?
    • Sort of, but it'll never happen. 
  • 6: What are you looking forward to in the next week?
    • I can't think of anything. 
  • 7: Do you want to be single?
    • Not particularly, no. 
  • 8: Did you go out or stay in last night?
    • I went to the gym if that counts as going out. 
  • 9: How late did you stay up last night?
    • Maybe like 11
  • 10: Can you recall the last time you realized you liked someone a lot?
    • Nope, not really. 
  • 11: Last three things you had to drink?
    • Water, water and coffee
  • 12: Have you pretended to like someone?
    • That's usually how it goes until they notice. 
  • 13: Have you ever told somebody you loved them and not actually meant it?
    • Nope. 
  • 14: Honestly, has anyone seen you in your underwear in the past 3 months?
    • Sorta, I guess. 
  • 15: Is it hard for you to get over someone?
    • Depends on how it ended, but generally I have no issues. 
  • 16: Think back five months ago, were you single?
    • I guess
  • 17: What were you doing at 12:30 this afternoon?
    • I was with one of my clients
  • 18: Hold hands with anyone this week?
    • No :[
  • 19: Could you go for the rest of your life without drinking alcohol?
    • No way. 
  • 20: What would you name your future daughter?
    • Olivia
  • 21: Do you miss anyone?
    • Nope. 
  • 22: Have you kissed three or more people in one night?
    • Only two. I'm slacking. 
  • 23: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed?
    • It did not. 
  • 24: Are you good at hiding your feelings?
    • Can't hide them to save my life, but I won't talk about them. 
  • 25: Have you ever cried from being so mad?
    • Usually that's why I cry. 
  • 26: Who did you last see in person?
    • My uncle. 
  • 27: Are you listening to music right now?
    • Of course, TPC. 
  • 28: What is something you currently want right now?
    • Ice cream would be nice. Damn you, Lent. 
  • 29: What is the last thing you said out lot?
    • Some comment about this horrible show. 
  • 30: How is your heart lately?

  • 31: Do you wear the hood on your hoodie?
    • yeah, I do sometimes. 
  • 32: Are you wearing socks?
    • Nope. 
  • 33: What do people call you?
    • My name. 
  • 34: Will you talk to the person you like tonight?
    • I will not. 
  • 35: Are there any stressful situations in your life?
    • Ohhhh yes. 
  • 36: Who did you last share a bed with?
    • Marissa
  • 37: Did you do something bad today?
    • Meh. I'm getting pathetic. That's bad to me. 
  • 38: When was the last time a member of the opposite sex hugged you?
    • Like two weeks ago? Three. I don't remember. 
  • 39: Do you get stressed out easily?
    • Yes. 
  • 40: Will you sing today?
    • Doubt it. 
  • 41: Have you ever wanted to tell someone something but didn’t?
    • Literally every second of every day. 
  • 42: Who do you go to when you need to talk to someone?
    • Usually Ashleigh
  • 43: Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance?
    • Nope. 
  • 44: What are you listening to right now?
    • "Beaches" by Tokyo Police Club
  • 45: What is wrong with you right now?
    • Just that I can't have ice cream and I'm getting annoyed at people who text me when they have girlfriends and have nothing to talk about but still text me every morning. 
  • 46: What is on your wrists right now?
    • Not at thing. 
  • 47: Where did you get the shirt/sweatshirt you’re wea
    • I think I bought it at Khols randomly. 
  • 48: What do you like better: hot chocolate or hot apple cider?
    • Hot chocolate. I hate hot apple cider. 
  • 49: Do you make wishes at 11:11?
    • Nope. 
  • 50: Are you a good artist?
    • I have not one artistic bone in my body. 
  • 51: Love really is a beautiful thing huh?
    • Beats me. 
  • 52: Do you miss the way things were six months ago?
    • Hummm...I don't know, one part of it. 
  • 53: Ever been on a golf cart?
    • Yes, but I hate driving them. 
  • 54: Do you have trust issues?
    • I just don't trust people. I don't think that's really an issue. 
  • 55: Ever stayed up all night on the phone, with who?
    • All night? No. I hate talking on the phone to 99% of people. 
  • 56: Do you own something from Hot Topic?
    • Possibly. 
  • 57: Do you use chap stick?
    • I DO!
  • 58: Have you ever slapped someone in the face?
    • No way. But I"ve been slapped in the face. 
  • 59: Do you have a little sister?
    • Nope. 
  • 60: Have you ever been to New York?
    • Yes. 
  • 61: Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?
    • I mean, my mom is the only one who says it. She better mean it. 
  • 62: Have you hugged someone within the last week?
    • I don't believe so. 
  • 63: What were you doing at midnight last night?
    • Sleeping. 
  • 64: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?
    • Yeah maybe the next day for a few hours then I stopped caring. 
  • 65: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?
    • Yeah, a few people. 
  • 66: Were your last three kisses from the same person?
    • Ugh, god. Yes. 
  • 67: Have you kissed anyone in the last five days?
    • nooo
  • 68: Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone?
    • If I'm actually sleeping like I have to get up the next day and be a functioning human being, alone for sure. But I like staying over with people. I can't sleep well if someone else is in the room. 
  • 69: Will next Friday be a good one?
    • I doubt it. 

Monday, March 24, 2014

are you gone are you there or just out of sight?

  • 1. What was the highlight of your week?
    The concert last night. 

    2. Whose car were you in last?

    3. When is the next time you will kiss someone?
  • Hopefully soon. 

  • 4. What color shirt are you wearing?
    5. How long is your hair?
    An inch or so past my shoulder. 

    6. Are you good looking?

    7. Last movie you watched?
    Mr. and Mrs. Smith

    8. Who were you with?
    You know. 

    9. Last thing you ate?
    Pulled Pork. 

    10. Last thing you drank?

    11. When was the last time you had your heart broken?
    Meh, let's say never. 

    12. Who came over last?

    13. Are you happy right now? 
  • At this exact moment, no. 
  • 14. What did you say last?
    Don’t remember

    15. Where is your phone?
    Right next to me

    16. What color are your eyes?

    17. Are you left-handed?

    18. Spell your name without vowels:

    19. Do you have any pets?

    20. Favorite vacation?
    Humm...we never go anywhere cool. 

    21. What do you dislike currently?
    This pain in my side. 

    22. What are you listening to?
    Tokyo Police Club. 

  • 23. If you could have one thing right now what would it be?
    Someone to just sit in my bed with me. 

    24. What is your favorite scent?
    Anything that smells clean. 

    25. Who makes you happiest?

    26. What were you doing at midnight last night?
    Talking to Marissa. 

    27. When is your birthday?
    May 31st

    28. Who has the same phone as you?
    Well only losers who still have the iPhone 4

    29. Last time you went swimming in a pool?
    Over the summer

    30. Do you read your horoscope?

    31. Where was the last place you bought something?

    32. How do you feel about your hair right now?
    Meh. It's up in a pony tail. 

    33. Do you bite your nails?
    Sadly, yes. I always have

    34. Do you have any expensive jewelry?
    Not really

    35. What is the best physical feature about the last person you kissed?

    36. How long have you had a Facebook, if you have one?
    Since senior year of high school. Then it's been deleted many times. 

    37. How fast have you driven a car?
    I think like 85?

    38. Have you ever smoked?

    39. What was or is your favorite subject in school?
    American History or Photography

    40. Do you have Verizon?

    41. What type of boy or girl do you usually fall for?
    Ones that like other girls while they're dating me. 

    42. Do you have any hidden talents?
    I'm almost always right at determining ETA's

    43. Favorite song?
    Any song by FOB. 

    44. Do you like to sing at all?

    45. Dream job?
    House wife. 

    46. Where does most of your family live?

    47. Are you an only child or do you have siblings?
    Two older sisters. 

    48. Would you consider yourself to be spoiled?
    Yes, honestly.

    49. What was the first thing you thought when you woke up?
    Where is my stupid alarm. 

    50. Do you drink alcohol?
    Oh no, never. 

    51. Know any other languages?

    52. Ever write a coded message?

    53. Have you ever been IN a wedding?

    54. Do you like your handwriting?
    I love how messy it is, honestly. I oddly take pride in it. 

    55. Did you take a nap today?

    56. Who has the same birthday as you?
    My cousin. Clint Eastwood. 

    57. Ever met anyone famous before?
    Sorta famous. 

    58. Do you want to be famous one day?
    That would be awesome

    59. Any pet peeves?
    A lottttt

    60. Are you multitasking right now?

    61. Do you like Britney Spears?

    62. What is your least favorite chore?

    63. Last place you drove your car?

    64. Ever been out of the country?
    65. Where were you born?
    St. Louis area. 

    66. Could you handle being in the military?

    67. What is your average cell phone bill?
    I don’t know, we have a family plan

    68. Who are you thinking about right now?
    I'm just thinking about the pain in my side. 

    69. When was the last time you laughed REALLY hard?
    Last night. 

    70. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
    Not that many. 

    71. Are your toes always painted?

    72. How many piercings do you have?

    73. What are you doing today?
    Well the day is over. 

    74. Have you ever been gambling?
    Been to the casino multiple times but never have gambled. 

    75. When is the last time you updated your theme?
    I don’t know

    76. Do you like rollercoasters?

    77. Have you ever been to disneyland or world?

    78. Do you have a favorite cartoon character?

    79. Last thing you cooked?

    80. How’s the weather?

    81. Do you e-mail?

    82. What’s the stupidest thing you ever did with your cell phone?

    83. Last time you were sick?
    A while ago. 

    84. What states have you lived in?
    MO, MD and PA

    85. Do you wish you could move?

    86. Where were you this time last year?
    Right here. 

    87. What is your dream car?
    Acura MDX
    88. Have you ever wanted someone you can’t have?
    Uh, duh. 

    89. If you could be anywhere right now where would it be?
    Here is okay, I just don't want to be alone. 

    90. Are you happy with your life?

If you read this, I'll give you a dollar. 

the heart's a lonely hunter.

I feel like I had a fairly decent weekend...
I went out for someone that I hardly know's 21st birthday. Oddly I was one of the youngest people in attendance. I drank a lot more than I usually do, but there were 22 oz beers for $3.00. Can't help it. I love Etna. And there was some older guy at the bar just buying drinks, so can't help that either. So therefore I couldn't do anything Saturday other than lay in bed and read. 
Oh and I watched American Horror Story Asylum all day. I didn't actually read very much. 
Then Sunday, Marissa came over around 1 and we went to Mad Mex then went shopping for a bit. THEN WE FINALLY SAW ALEX WINSTON. I've never been to a concert where the performer sounded better live than on CD. She was so tiny in real life, I was surprised. Must be nice. 
Alex was opening up for a band called Grouplove and I had their CD and wasn't impressed by it. When they came out on stage it was kind of like an alien attack from the 80's. I can't describe it. A lot of smoke and green lights. Well, they were good. The whole time leading up to the concert, I was thinking that I'd convince Marissa to leave in the middle of Grouplove, but I liked them so much I thought I'd stay put. Stage AE is such a nice concert venue if anyone is ever in Pittsburgh. I've thoroughly enjoyed all of the shows that I've seen there, three so far. The first one was Fall Out Boy so no question there. Then I saw Tegan and Sara which I wasn't too impressed with, but I was very impressed with my 8 dollar beer. Then the Grouplove/Alex Winston concert sounded so good. Grouplove didn't impress me at all with their album, but they sure know how to get the crowd going. I've been to so many concerts I can't even count or remember half of them, but I can't even explain to you  how happy everyone was at this concert. I don't think I've ever seen a group of people enjoying life so much at the same time. So much dancing and smiling. All I could do was be happy for them as I don't jump up and down and wave my hands in the air to anyone other than Fall Out Boy or Taking Back Sunday. The guy next to me was literally having the time of his life. It made me really happy. 
And then I got Marissa lost and we ended up at Arby's. Marissa stayed over and when we were getting ready in the morning she asked if we had toothpaste and I told her it was "behind the glass door". She said, "you mean the mirror?". Yeah, that's what I meant. This was post coffee.
And work was good today. 

I would complain about Honda but then I would have to think about it. I guess it's good everything is working out finally. I've only been going through car hell for the past year. 

I've also started to practice my subtly and up until a few hours ago it made me feel better about my situation. Now I just feel so bad. Like bad enough to eat a baby pig. Which tasted so good. 
I've been painting my nails black again. Partly because I went to a concert last night and partly because I love the way they look when my fingers are moving around. And also cause my soul. hahaah But really I like the shiny black. 

Saturday, March 22, 2014


I love fall out boy and I'm pretty sure I'm going to get "I don't believe a word you say, but I can't stop listening" tattooed on my leg. 


Thursday, March 20, 2014

take it or leave it, you're the one who needs it.

You know when your mind starts to think things that it shouldn't be thinking. Not thinking about morbid or perverse things, but just wandering down roads it shouldn't go? And when something that used to seem so annoying randomly becomes endearing? I guess when I have no one wondering what I'm doing, I then just constantly need someone to want to know if I'm going to the bathroom or what time I'm going to be back. It's embarrassing because the last thing I ever want to be is needy and I hate needy people, but what can you do. It's actually comforting in a way. 
And I'll just keep rambling, but when you should be mad at something that happened, but you're really not. I guess it's the "fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me" thing. Fool me eight times, I don't even think I can admit it happened again. But here I am singing a Third Eye Blind song about your sweater. 
Speaking of relationships, why is everyone always in such a hurry? I just really don't understand people. My cousin is engaged after who knows how long...a few months really. She just got divorced in the fall. And whatever, I'm sure the guy she's marrying is a great guy and more power to her for having someone that wants to marry her or be with her and actually mean it and not say stupid things like talking about getting married when they don't mean it and excuse this run on i'm too lazy to use commas and periods. 
But I was talking to my uncle about this thing I have... And I've said it a million times before but I will not get married until I have a huge freaking engagement ring. Before I explain myself, it makes me sound like a gold digger, but I just consider myself to be responsible. One of my staff got engaged and no one noticed because her ring was so small you couldn't even tell she was wearing one. That only tells me one thing; not that neither individual in the couple is show-y, but that they are not ready to get married. I just don't think that you're ready to be married when you don't make a stable income. Not to say that you need to be millionaires, money isn't really the point. But if you're still so young and broke that you have to get your engagement ring at K-mart because that's all you can afford and not because you're trying to be ironic or something, then we run into a problem. I think I just want stability. I don't want others to speculate how my bills are being paid and if I have a job. I don't want to bring children into this world until I know that I have enough money to buy them baby Uggs and send them to private schools in the city and have my husband buy me that Burberry bag that I've wanted for years and not have to feel guilty about buying it. I'm not saying that I want to be a millionaire, I just don't want to ever think that I might not be able to pay a bill this month. 
That's why I don't get why people rush into so much. Maybe they're in love, who knows. But really, isn't your love going to be there in 5 years when you've graduated from college, you've got a job and you know that Miller Lite is not a very acceptable beer choice? I assume it will still be around. I wouldn't know, but I assume. And plus, I want my husband to have a job where he wears a suit to work, because that's just perfect. And I'm not even ashamed to admit that. I just don't know why you need to get married to prove that you're in love. I sometimes think that getting married after knowing each other for a few months is actually a sign of the complete opposite. Like you have this intense lust at this very moment and you want everyone to know about it so you just think you have to get married. What happens in 6 months when you realize that your husband is addicted to porn, cheats on you and a psychotic obsession with collecting blue ball point pens with the gel ink? Then you get freaked out and you get divorced like you're in 10th grade and you're breaking up. It doesn't make sense to me. 

At least ALEX is happening on Sunday and I'm getting my hair dyed so I have a few good things to look forward to this weekend. 

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Your lips smudging all my makeup....

I really don't understand people. Not even talking about the idiots in my life right now. Just other people. WHY
would you do something so stupid. I realize I have issues when it comes to relationships, who doesn't, but come onnn

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

It's just that I am not in the market For a boy who wants to love only me

I have never found a clip that more justly defines my life.

Thursday, March 13, 2014

you could tear my heart like pages in a magazine

I feel like all I've been talking about lately is music. And here's something else that I've found:


The CD came out in 2013 so I'm sure I'm the last to hear of her. I was stumbling around Tumblr and found her. I also downloaded the Lily Allen song that was on Girls:

Anyway, I got in a car accident on Monday so there's that. 

Yeah. I had a ten minute debate in my head about if I should get gas or not. Part of me was like "nah, you'll be late to work and you're not on E yet". Then there was that other part of me that was like "you won't be late late and then you won't have to get gas after work". Unfortunately I went with the latter thought. The parking lot is hard to explain, but when I pull out on to the street there are parking spots behind me on the right that are on an angle. So I'm waiting to pull out and some guy in a company truck just backs in to me. I didn't see it coming as I was focusing on pulling out to a busy road and not what was happening behind me. Well, he ran into my car. It's below the right taillight and it's not horrible. So I called his work/insurance company about 30 times on Monday and they finally called back today. They said I just need to get an estimate. So I asked my uncle if he knew anyone good and he told me about this place on Rt 8. I called them and they said that it'll be a while. Whatever, I can drive around with a dent I guess. I just want to go some where good. When I was forced to go to some shady place out in Oakland when the Rav got smashed up (why do people always hit me?) they did such a crappy job and I don't want that to happen to my car. 
Well, I made an appointment to get the damage estimated and what do you know? My engine starts misfiring AGAIN. Which I guess is a good thing because I need to get my engine replaced by April 10th so I can get the settlement. So I brought my car to my mechanic this afternoon. How sad is it that I need a mechanic? That's how crappy my "nice" car is. 

And today was so much fun cause I woke up and the power was out. Thankfully it came back on around 7:20 cause I needed to get a shower and do my make up decently. We all know that. 

In other news, I'm obsessed with the Beach Wood candle still. My paranoia about it catching the house on fire is out of the roof, but it smells good so you have to weigh the pros and cons. 

I really need to start getting upset about things, too.