Thursday, January 30, 2014

You said you gotta be up in the morning, gonna have an early night/And you're starting to bore me, baby/ Why'd you only call me when you're high?

I'm feeling a wide range of emotions right now. I really have no idea why. I think I just feel like feeling this way, maybe? I was actually in a swell mood when I left work because something that has been causing me a little bit of stress has sort of been pushed off on someone else and I feel better about that. I love not having the responsibility. 
But my irresponsibility is what kills me.
Literally kills me.
I just can't stop listening to "Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High" and for some reason it's making me really emotional. No, it's not even the song. It's other things that I can't even explain even if I tried. I just wish I could hibernate. 
And I'm just in one of those moods where I want to be alone but I don't want to be alone. You know what I mean?

I just really want a bulldog puppy and someone to rub my back. 

I spent all morning looking at minimum wage articles on Tumblr this morning while I was at Panera. It really sucks having your political beliefs align with 50 year old white men on most issues (being as fiscally conservative as anyone could be). I was in the SSA yesterday with a client and the conversations these people were having were insane. They were saying that the CEO's of McDonald's and Burger King need to pay their workers more money because the CEO's are making all this money they could afford to pay their workers more money. SURE, SURE IF THIS WAS A UTOPIA LET'S GO WITH THAT.
And I'm not even going to say anything else. 
They also were screaming about Justin Beiber and how he's ruining the country. 

Saturday, January 25, 2014

Don't get that sinking feeling, don't fall apart.

So it snowed a lot last night, and hasn't stopped. It just keeps going. I'm honestly so sick of the snow. The cold is sort of a tertiary problem as it doesn't affect me getting to work, even though I'm not a fan. Now I'm not ready to pull the "I can't wait for summer" card. I hate summer. I hate being hot. I hate sweating. I hate having to wear tank tops and stuff. I'd rather wear scarves and boots and whatnot, so I still like winter better. The only thing I like about summer is the beach. Well, not like I've been in a while, but still. I like the warm feeling. I don't care too much for going in the water and I hate sand, I just really do like that feeling that you get when you're nice and toasty and the sun is shining. All that vitamin D is a blessing. 
 See, I can't take pictures, but I like the haziness of this. 

So in trying to find a picture of the beach that didn't involve myself looking disgusting in a bathing suit, I had to go back to 2010 and that prompted me to look through my "old computer"'s the aftermath of things I used to love/do/how lame I was in my last year of college:

So there was this cat, James, who we later found out was actually a girl. Anyway, Marissa and I were obsessed with James. She would just follow us around our neighborhood and into the building. We loved James. James was a very friendly and thought she owned 423 Biddle, which she did. Well...side note... I found out it was a girl because her owner was walking up the stairs behind me and he was telling me about how James is a girl after I called her a "him". That was the only interaction that I ever had with any of my neighbors. So one day, James kind of followed Marissa and I into our apartment. I'm not sure how it happened and I also can't remember if we hated our one roommate, Lauren, yet. But she was allergic to cats and we let James play around in her room. So maybe we did hate her at that point? Gosh, we were so vindictive.  
 Obligatory picture at the zoo with the polar bear. This was when Marissa and I interviewed to work at the zoo. Bad Idea. 
 Here's the poor old Rav right after my accident. I had to drive around like this for over two weeks cause the asshole who hit me WOULDN'T submit his claim and so I couldn't use the insurance money until he did that. His name was Dominic, and I hate him. 
 I was obsessed with the self timer feature and jumping off things. Remember when we liked Jacqui?
 And Lisa? We used to be so close. I haven't talked to her in like three years. 
 And we all know how pretty Solomon's is. 
 And here's Denise and me at Taking Back Sunday. I remember I brought a whole bag of Doritos because I'm a fat ass. This concert was so much fun and probably the only time in my life I was moshing. I normally hate moshing, but I was like high on something that night, because it was so much fun. I was front row and note to self: a strapless dress isn't a good idea for a concert. 
 And this is the aftermath of St. Patrick's Day I believe in 2009. This was the night I vowed never to get obsessed with anyone again because I was still sad about Mark forever later. FOREVER later. I'm not posting any other pictures from this night because this was my "filter" phase and they were all green, funny, I know. And also, my hair was short and I was really ugly this night and also very intoxicated so I look like an annoying college kid in all of the pictures and plus I was ugly so...
 And the night that we took the carpet up in the dining room. Still obsessed with the self timer feature. 
 And more obsessions with the filter, this time, blue. We had to wear white for initiation. I HATED initiation. You stood around with candles and we probably sang and it took forever and you had to wear these white choir robes and sometimes you had to wear ropes all round your midsection, but we never had enough so only seniors got to wear them. I think, my memory is shot and I'm probably not allowed to talk about this. 
 I do miss being in SMC. 
 My 21st birthday. I miss us. 
 This is my favorite picture of Marissa and me. It's just so funny in so many ways. I don't even know if we were drinking. It just makes me die laughing every time I look at it. 
 And this was probably one of my favorite days of my life. Warped Tour 2008 maybe? Maybe 2009? I have no idea. But I miss those sunglasses so much. My uncle sat on them at the beach and broke them. And I miss my teeth, they were so white. 
 Just more of such a good day. 
 And why are we so cute?
 So this is the day after Halloween 2009, I assume. Marissa, Jacqui and I just went down to Frick Park and took literally 300 pictures. 
 And these weird fish things are so cute.
 And our favorite place. 

Marissa was pregnant in these pictures and that seems like SO long ago. Wow. I love them so much though. I want it to be fall again. 

 Why am I so awkward?
 This was the beginning of the  "Senior Picture" thing

 This is probably the prettiest tree on the planet. I loved taking pictures of this thing.
 And here's me being a cat for the 900th time, Ashley and Denise 
 Okay, well I look hideous in this picture. Jacqui curled our hair and we both loved it. And I think Marissa was pregnant here and she was Lolita, so behold the irony. 
 I don't even know the point of this. We had to go to J.Crew for some "personal shopping" time. Oh, A.Phi
 And I loved taking unfocused pictures with my Nikon. 
 And here's me refusing to go to formal because I had no one to go with, like Prom, except I didn't care about going to dances in college. Everyone got so mad at me. Well, Steph did because she gets overworked about everything. 
 And I literally used to take so many pictures of myself. Why did I think that it was okay for me to wear such a short dress? I do not know. 
 Here's more of the aftermath of the discovery of the self timer/continuous shot feature. 
And after Red Dress, we went to Taco Bell and sat in the parking lot for a while eating tacos. That was the only part I enjoyed about Red Dress. 

In other, current news, wow, the Arctic Monkey's new album is so good. I've had it for a while but today was the first time I listened to it. 

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

I've been looking so long at these pictures of you that I almost believe that they're real

So I got home tonight and I realized that I'll never be an adult. How are people responsible? I don't get it. Even when I'm at work and these people I work with that have intellectual disabilities or crippling mental illnesses and they can pay their bills. So I open my mail today and I have an overdue bill that started out as $72.58 and now it's $188.92. This is just cause it's overdue. I don't have that much money. 
Also, my irresponsibility bit me in the ass again. So as you know, I lose my debit card like 7 or 8 times a year, however, usually it pops back up at some point. Usually a few days later I find it under the seat of my car or in my purse or other random places. But I went to Church Brew Works two or so Thursday's ago I guess I lost my debit card there cause that's the last place I used it. My mom yelled at me and told me that I needed to cancel it and get another one. So I did. I did the adult thing and didn't leave my millions up to chance and cancelled my card. The thing is, I was sort of obsessed with my debit card, proud of it in a way. It was a picture of the fountain at Duquesne. And that's what it's been all the times I got a new card after the previous one expired. This time it's a black background with a Duquesne ring that's all glowy.  
I can't win. 

So 2014 resolution: Be more of an adult. 
Also, not be 300 pounds. 

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

As I was watching the Pitt/Some other team that was orange basketball game and eating my combination birthday cake/sea salt caramel ice cream, I was thinking about how great Elisabeth Moss is. I was trying to think about it over this weird noise that Pitt fans were making. Apparently, according to Jason, it's their "signature sound", whatever that means. It sounded like birds in a wind tunnel and I hate noise so I left to write this blog.
Anyway, Elisabeth Moss:
I know she's not the most attractive girl out there, but I can't even take how much I love her. She's honestly beyond perfect. And this dress, I almost can't function looking at it.

Just kidding:
She is perfect.

Anyway, I really only like her character in Mad Men, Peggy Olson, mostly because that's the only thing I've ever seen her in. But it's perfect. I spend a lot of my free time, more so during Mad Men season, thinking about Pete and Peggy being together. It's this obsession I've had since they first got together. It's not even a given that they'll end up together or even be together again, I just think about it a lot. The first two pictures in this set depict what is probably my favorite scene in the whole series. I know I shouldn't love Pete the way I do, but I can't help it. Can we just focus on the way he looks at her?

I think that I like to think of myself like Peggy, I don't really want to go into it, and none of you watch Mad Men so it doesn't matter. But she just finally finds herself.  
I think Peggy is great because she doesn't let people get to her, but she still does in a way, you know? She started off as this really self-conscious secretary who screws Pete because that's what she thinks that she has to do and then she ends up being this awesome, strong woman. She still lets people walk all over her, but she does what she can. Everyone says she's a feminist, which is okay by me. She is actually a true feminist. 

Saturday, January 18, 2014

You told me that you wanted this I told you it was all yours If you're done with it Then what you say forever for?

I'm still listening to Miley
#GETITRIGHT is the greatest song on the CD (right now) other than the fact that she says the "p" word. This is the only time I've ever heard someone say "babe" and I liked it. She says "Babe, don't make me waiiit"

Anyway, here are some pictures from October that I forgot about: