Thursday, December 27, 2012

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, kiss my ass. Kiss his ass. Kiss your ass. Happy Hanukkah.

So I just wrote this entire post and then it deleted itself because I pushed some random keyboard combination. So...Here are the pictures that I put on it because I have no desire to type all of that nonsense again. 

I just collaged them all so I didn't have to upload each one.

Gotta sleep so I can go to work tomorrow and brave the treacherous (most likely) ice storm.

Are you happy to know I'm unhappy alone?

So I'm sitting in my room and I hear Ashleigh outside bitching about how I'm in my room already and it's not even 8pm. 
A. I'm tired
B. I'm trying out my new face mask you bought me, rudeness. 
It's Cupcake by Lush (of course by Lush,  I know). It feels sort of weird and it smells just like birthday cake so from the get-go I love it. I'm not really sure how long to leave it on as it feels sort of drying right now. I just wiped it off and I don't know how I feel. My skin feels softer but nothing to write home about. Just smells good.

It's December 26th and I've had a fairly hectic week. And when I say that I mean the only thing I did was work. I worked my 16 hours on Sunday then again on Christmas Even and then I worked Christmas morning. I actually enjoyed watching the kids open their presents. For some reason I thought they would be more excited. But I guess  most of them don't believe in Santa and they know that some technical institute of Pittsburgh donates their presents and they generally know what they're getting. They're going to destroy 90% of their gifts by the time I get back tomorrow. 

I'm going to leave on the 28th for Maryland and hopefully it's not snowing. I really hope not because neither Ashleigh or I can drive in snow and my car is a diva and just doesn't do what it doesn't want to do.

I got a lot of stuff for Christmas. Way more than I thought I would get. My big gifts were a turntable and then the Northface jacket that I've been wanting. I got some makeup things:

I got 
  • Cupcake mask (Lush)
  • Naked 2 (Urban Decay)
  • Jackie Oates Colour Supplement (Lush)
  • Naked Basics that I bought myself before
  • Christmas (Urban Decay)
  • Mascara (Tarte)
  • Miracle Leave In Treatment (It's a 10)
Basically other than what I've mentioned, I got a crap ton of gift cards so I'll be good with my coffee fix for a while. Got Starbucks, Panera, McDonald's and Macy's. I have so many things that I want to buy now.  All day I wanted to go to the mall but Alex, Ashleigh and I just ended up laying around the house and getting Grandma mad about diapers...don't even ask about that one. By the time we all finally got showered and ready it was sleeting outside and no one wanted to drive anywhere. I even got dressed and cleaned my car. I wanted to show off my new jacket, but that's a no-go. I'll just show everyone at work tomorrow. Now I need some records so I can listen to my turntable :] 

I really want to see Ellen before I leave, but that probably won't happen because my life sucks. I also didn't get to see Marissa while she was in Ohio so I'm sort of upset about that. But I got to see everyone in my family, so that's okay. Oh and I get to see Jamie and all of my Maryland friends next week so that helps the burn a little.

Monday, December 24, 2012

How dare you say it's nothing to me. Baby you're the only light I think I ever saw.

Alright now, I've done 16 hours and 41 minutes of my 40 hour span of work. All of the kids are sleeping and part of me hopes they sleep forever. They can sleep the next 15 hours for all I care.
But alas, I'm not that lucky and I can't imagine that would be healthy even for teenagers.

I'm bored and just looking at John Mayer and Miranda lambert on Tumblr. I haven't blogged in a while but of course I have nothing to say. It's almost Christmas. Whoohoo. Haven't really wrapped anything. Still need to get stuff. I honestly don't have the slightest idea where the gift I bought my dad ended up.

So lets just pray that I can make it until 11 tonight. I'll worry about the fact that I have to be here again at 7am tomorrow. Cross that bridge when I get to it. Thankfully I remembered my phone charger today.

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

it's such a shame for us to part.

I watched Country Strong last night and I honestly cried during the entire thing. It was basically just a bunch of really sad conversations strung together to make a movie. Basically a sob-fest that I loved. A lot. A little too much. I'm not the biggest Paltrow fan and I didn't like her in this movie, but all of the characters were honestly perfect. I don't know if it was the acting or what, but they all had a lot of...character. For lack of a better word. And Beau, the male lead, wow. 
This song:

I've always wished that I was really into country. The lyrics are always so beautiful. 

I'm still working on this whole "going to the gym" thing. I have so much to do. And when I say that I mean I'm still trying to find blogs that I like. I'm watching Somewhere right now and I don't like it. I'm honestly not in the mood to do anything. I checked about 57 movies out of the library and I only watched Country Strong.  In the past 3 or so weeks I've honestly read about 700 pages of about 10 books but I can't seem to finish any of them. I hate when I get like this. When nothing is interesting. That's why I need to work. I need to have something to distract part of my attention. When I have nothing I just have no focus. 

Also, this Christmas is going to suck. Let's see what we have on the work line-up:
Sunday 7am-11pm
Christmas Eve 7am-11pm
Christmas 7am-3pm

So I'm hoping I go back to work tomorrow and by some miracle my schedule is changed up. But I know that's not happening. So, God hates me. Thanks dude.

And in even more news that no one cares about, I downloaded the Glee version of "The Scientist" and it's not good. Only the first few seconds that Finn sings. And this is weird because my normal reaction is that Finn ruins all songs he sings. Maybe he took voice lessons or something. Thank God.

I'm kinda hungry now. I need to slow my eating roll though. I'm weigh too much now (see what I did there?) I had myself a really fancy salad yesterday. All greens and stuff. I made brussel sprouts, which I just recently ate and discovered that I love, and spinach and sugar snap peas and all that good stuff. 

Who knows. It tasted gooood though.
and then for dinner I had cake and about 7 large helpings of spaghetti. eek

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Honey, all the movements you're starting to make See me crumble and fall on my face

That's what it looks like. That random house is our neighbor's house. We can't compete with them. 
Sorry for my shitty pictures. 

I honestly think that "The Scientist" is the greatest song I've ever heard.

tell me your secrets, ask me your questions.

I think that I'm always personally offended that people don't know who Holden Caulfield is. Last night at my friends house, this one boy didn't know who Holden was. He's just a big part of my life.  I mean, I think that I read him differently than most literary scholars and whatnot, but I think that he is exactly what I need him to be. This quote, though. That's how I feel about every situation.
Trying to be inspirational with myself for this one. Nothing is going to happen. Call me Ms. Pessimistic.
This is how I feel on a daily basis. I'm glad that someone thinks it's okay. I'm not sure if I still have my "youth" or whatever, but I like to think that I can still fall into this category. I spent the drive home this morning talking to my friend Whitney about growing up and how neither of us have any idea what we're going to do with our lives or what we want out of it. Of course she has one of those fancy full time office jobs where she makes like 7 times more money than I do, but we're all equally confused so that makes it a little better, I suppose.
This is for all of us hopeless romantics.

Must be Santa.

We're finally in the Christmas spirit here at the Maloney household. 

 We didn't even joke when it came to baby Jesus this year. We got genuine straw from Bethlehem and all.

We basically spent like 6 hours working on this. I'm going to take some pictures with my Nikon since it's now 7:30 and dark outside but my battery was dead (go figure since I never use my camera), so I'll go out in a few minutes and take some.

Saturday, December 15, 2012

I was lost, I was lost over lines I shouldn't have crossed.

I know that I've made a lot of mistakes in my life, but downloading the new version of iTunes was probably the biggest one I've ever made. DON'T DO IT! The actual part where you listen to your own music is set up much like the iTunes store itself. It's honestly ridiculous. I'm contemplating deleting it and downloading a previous version that doesn't suck.

See. It's weird. And that's not even the half of gets worse.

Looks like the iTunes store. That's not what I want. 

You know when you feel like crap? Yes, yes, every day, I know. But You just need someone to tell you that you're pretty. And whatever, it's not like you'd believe them, or care about their opinion, but still. That's how I feel every day. And...

I'm going to my friends house for their birthday. I'm nervous since I haven't done anything other than work or sit alone and watch Love It or List It in honestly 4 months. I don't even think I've been to a bar (other than Mad Mex) since this summer. Maybe that means I'm lame, maybe that means I've lost all hope. Probably the latter. I've come to the point in my life where I need a cup of coffee in order to function. Like I said, I'm trying to cut back, but I really can't. 

I wuv coffee and pie.

Can I go out like this? As much as I hate the Lush conditioner that I got (Big Solid leaves my hair pretty dry) It does make my hair big for my limp hair. I feel like a scene kid. I also like this black and white feature on my webcam cause it looks like I'm actually wearing make up (still look gross though) when in reality I'm not wearing anything. So I can just fool you guys to think that I care about my appearance.

Thursday, December 13, 2012

You will be back someday. And this awkward kiss that tells of other people's lips will be of service to giving you away.

I got all of my Lush stuff- FINALLY. That was such a long wait.
I'm sort of excited for Christmas, I'm not even that mad I get to spend it with all of those stupid kids. I mean, I am but I'm hoping that they decide to act like civilized human beings and we can have fun.
I'm not ever in the Christmas spirit. I don't really like Christmas Music, though I do listen every once in a while.

I bought my pest pair of non-skinny jeans since like freshman year of college. I like them cause they're stretchy as all get out and they can be my new fat jeans. Well, most of my jeans are fat jeans but you know how that goes.

I'm bored. Probably going to take an unnecessarily long time to get ready for work because I have no life, hence the pointless post. I just wanted to use that title. That song came on while I was running my monthly mile at the gym this morning and, well, you know.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012


You know what I hate? People that think they're professional photographers but they suck. Like who is paying you to take their picture when you're trying to pass a D3000 off as professional photography.
That sounds mean of me, but let me get paid for that.

I was 21 and not having any fun

I can't focus on anything. Really. It's sad.
Not sure what I need to focus on, specifically.
I think I miss school. I miss writing papers and learning things because I had to, not because I want to. I have no intrinsic motivation, so I need all that extrinsic junk that makes me do things, makes me learn things. Someone give that to me. 
I know that I'll probably never go back to school. I guess it's part of the plan, but I'm not sure if it'll happen. 
I guess I need to start reading furtively again, but none of the books I'm currency reading are even interesting me. That's sad. I think my obsession with books just ebbs and flows. I mean, it's always there and I always want to read, but sometimes I can function without reading, sometimes I can't. It's probably not as weird as I think. 

We had my GoGo's 80th birthday party on Sunday and my family came up for it. It was nice. Of course it wasn't fun or interesting or exciting or anything because Lauren, Ashleigh and I sat and talked to two old people who were supposedly our distant cousins or something. Then we did the whole mingle with our aunts and be bored out of our minds thing. Took some pictures, ate some cake. Called it a day then went to the mall.

That night, Ashleigh, Jason and I went to pick out a tree. The lot we normally go to was closed as this was 7pm on a Sunday night. But we went over to this place that I didn't even know existed, located in the Dollar Store parking lot. We were surprised by both the quality of the trees and the quality of service. Normally I hate when sales people follow you around and don't realize that you like to look around alone, but this guy didn't bother me. We looked at about four trees, all perfect as far as Christmas trees go, and we picked the winner within 10 minutes. It was weird being the one driving with a tree on top of my car. I'm not sure why.

My goal before work is to get my laundry all washed, folded and put away. I did my laundry about 3 weeks ago and it's still to be folded. So once it's all done, I'm going to take the time to hang everything up and put it in drawers so Gram doesn't get mad. And clean up a little. I'm actually very proud of how clean I've been keeping my room. This might also have to do with the fact that I shoved everything under my bed so my dad didn't kill himself when he slept here...details. 

As music goes, I've basically been listening to Fall Out Boy, namely "Disloyal Order of Water Buffaloes". I like when it says "detox just to retox" cause I feel like, however lamely, fits with my life. And I feel like being lame.

This is the cake we got at work. Ain't that cute. I didn't eat it cause I'm fat and had about 30 of the cookies and about 10 slices of pizza. But you know. The kids liked it.

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

there isn't a damn thing i could do or say, up in the skyway.

We don't want any over here.
Sorry, had to get that off my chest. 
But sometimes I just get really mad and my teen angst comes out in full force and I imagine smacking people in the head with a bat. I know this probably isn't healthy for my mind, I should imagine talking out my problems with them, but that, to me, sounds worse than getting my teeth pulled out sans Novocaine. So instead I think this:
My imagination: cheaper than therapy.
Just call me Tennessee. And we all know who the zombie is.
You know what I don't get? Why am I like the only one upset that Fall Out Boy isn't making music anymore? Also, that Patrick Stump is skinny. At least he still has his muttonchops. That's really all that matters. I was listening to "What a Catch, Donnie" and I think that's the greatest compilation song ever. Is that a thing, a compilation song? Well whatever. The last 45 seconds of that song remind me of heaven. 
You know what else reminds me of heaven, or I guess what I think heaven will be like?
this song:

It's goregous and makes me wish that it was 1989 and I was laying in bed with my record playing. I told Jamie this and she didn't agree. 

But I'm trying to focus on happy things and next time you see me I'll probably just pull this face and be done with it:

I guess in semi-fun news, I went to a Mexican joint last night with some of my sisters. It was nice to see them since I haven't seen humans in a while. Then I went to Mad Mex with Ellen and got this amazing Red Spicy Ale. I was transported to a Christmas heaven. It was beautiful. 

I guess goodnight. Going to finish the third Dexter book (hopefully). When I finish you can read about it hereeeeeee


Just watching Gossip Girl and reading Cosmo. 
I'm just hella confused about Carly Rae Jepsen. Get off my magazine you 30 year old moonlighting as a 13 year old.

Hope your day is as uneventful as mine.
People suck.
Can I be Blair Waldorf. 
Screw everyoneeeeeeeeeeeeee and live alone. 
Or Mindy Kaling. 
Alright thanks.

Monday, December 3, 2012

If you're worried about the weather then you picked the wrong place to stay.

I have so much new music to dig through. I haven't gotten very far because  I'm stuck on this album 10x10x10 by Tokyo Police Club that I don't know how I didn't know about. But basically the band I claim is my favorite sing a whole bunch of covers of songs I've never heard of except for "Since U Been Gone", "Party in the USA", "Sweetness", "South Side" and my favorite "Under Control" by the Strokes. 
This song, "Strictly Game" has so many quotable verses I love it.
The one that fits perfectly with my job (I'll make it pretty to liven up my blog):

Make a little money, take a lot of shit.

Feel real bad then get over it. 

I like this song. It's originally by the Harlem Shakes, but I obviously love TPC more than anymore.

Wanna know what shit I take at work?

 I'm just a big baby and I took about 900 pictures of this bruise, but I mean, it's pretty sizable. It's the first one of importance that I've gotten while at work. So you can feel sorry for me. I appreciate any sympathy, guys.
 I'm not sure how this got on here, but this cake was amazing. From this summer, but ya know.
 I got this from Lush tonight. I've used up all my sample and it didn't really do much for me but I'm pretty obsessed with the smell. Lush R&B hair moisturizer. I think that it's supposed to be really good for thick and curly hair. It sort of sticks to my hair and makes it a tad greasy. But again, I like the smell and if I don't use a lot it doesn't make my hair too greasy. Just pretty soft and delicious smelling. Apparently it smells like jasmine, but since I don't know what that smells like, to me it smells like heaven.
 This shampoo. I've been waiting for it to come out and I finally got around to picking some up. It's got bananas in it, if that means anything to any one. Also smells good. Supposed to be for damaged hair and I've got plenty of that. My hair at the moment is about 50 shades of brown. Starting with natural hair color (poop brown) working it's way down to overly processed, highlighted light golden brown. It's sort of a free for all. Like I'm attempting to do that whole ombre thing but it's not turning out too well. Someone better dye my hair ASAP. Until then I'll just keep complaining. You're welcome.
Other than the fact that I look like a legitimate retard in this picture, I went to the Macy's dahntahn because that is the ONLY place in Pittsburgh that houses a Lush store. So I keep making my uncle drive to the city and walk around Macy's while I shop and talk to the Lush employees for 45 minutes. Anywho, these are the Christmas windows and some random shots of Santaland. I was hoping for an Elf sort of feel, but no go. Just a whole lotta disappointment. Life.

I had this really great metaphor thought up last night about this thing that's going on with me, but I can't remember it. Or I can but when I type it out it sounds pretty ridiculous. Basically I want to know but I don't want to ask. I hate what's going on right now, but it's better than not having anything. It's already gone though, so I don't know why I care. I don't even care. I just think I'm supposed to care. I care because I have nothing else. 
In a completely different situation...And why do you think that I want to be your friend? Somethings are baffling. I'm not going to be your 7th choice, so you can go shave your disgustingly hairy back now. But not your face cause I love beards.
Holy subblog. Get over it.
Boys are stupid.